August 11, 22024
1 Kings 3:5-12
Introduction
Me or we? It’s a question each of us faces and answers every day as we say our prayers, make decisions, establish priorities, and just live our lives. Do we live as insulated and isolated individuals or as a person connected to and interdependent with others? Me doesn’t just apply to a single individual. Me could be a group, a parish, a business. Which means, me or we is a choice made by religions, political parties, corporations, nations, and even churches.
Me or We?” is a question Solomon faced when God came to him in a dream and said, “Ask what I should give to you.” Which sounds like a great deal because it sounds like God has signed and given Solomon a blank check, and all he needs do is fill in the amount.
Which is what all of us would love to have happen to us, right? Who hasn’t at one time, or another, wished for that kind of “winning lottery ticket”? We’ve probably all played the if-you-could-have-anything-in-the-world game. So be honest, what would you ask for? Since I’m up here, I’ll go first.
First off, I would no longer be driving a fifteen-year-old minivan. Neither Julie nor myself would ever cook again, but rather a guy named Bobby Flay would do all our cooking. For at least the first three innings of every home game, I would be the starting centerfielder for the Guardians. And since we are talking about God’s power, and not just the state lottery, there are a few names from my high school days who could still use a little smiting! Nothing permanent mind you. Just a stern reminder that you should never bully the kid who liked Christian heavy metal music!
Maybe your response to God’s offer is similar—or maybe not. Still, the idea of focusing on me is hard to dismiss. But for Solomon, it is. It’s easy for him to dismiss because he knows this is not a game. He is aware that to make this personal or to be selfish could be disastrous. He knows this is about real life and real death. And because it is, God’s question comes with a dilemma, and Solomon’s answer could potentially carry profound consequences. Solomon must decide between asking for himself or asking for the larger we, of which he is also a part.
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Me or We?” is the question Solomon faced when God came to him in a dream and said, “Ask what I should give to you.” Which sounds like a great deal. But who is it a great deal for? Me? Or we?
God asked this question of Solomon. And now, today, God also asks this question to us.
Move 1
God came to Solomon in a dream and said, “Ask what I should give to you.”
That this question comes to Solomon in the night, in a dream, suggests it comes from a deep interior place. Which is fitting because his answer will also come from that deep interior place.
We are often blind to and unaware of the choice between me and we as we face the circumstances of our life and world. We tend to focus on what is happening around us rather than what is happening within us.
When disruptions occur, of whatever sort, something that throws our life off balance, something that challenges, troubles, or frightens us, we almost immediately begin thinking about a response. What will we do? How will we do it? But often, and in many ways, those are really secondary questions.
The primary question is the awareness of others and the interior condition from which we will respond. Are the people I care about the most… Or the people I am committed to serving and helping and leading…are they impacted? How do my core values, my foundation influence and inform how I will respond? That’s how Solomon lives, that’s how Jesus lived—and that is what Jesus taught. He was not one who led a me-life, nor was he a me-teacher.
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So what about us? Is our awareness and response limited to me or is it a we awareness and response? The answer to that question will likely determine the quality of our relationships and the extent to which we live in conflict. Look at the world today, read the news, reflect on your own relationships. If there is conflict, there is probably also a me attitude. We see that in the political divisions around our country—especially in the presidential race. We see it in the ongoing debate in our own country about citizens and immigrants. We see conflict everywhere. So is there a me attitude at its root?
But it’s not just global issues though. The choice between me and we exists in marriages and families. It’s a part of prejudice and discrimination as well as the hardened moral positions we so often take against another. Look at conflict and chances are you won’t see a we attitude or a we life. You’ll see instead a me attitude, a me life.
Move 2
Now, to be clear, I’m not suggesting a we attitude fixes every conflict, ends every war, or settles every debate. It won’t. It’s not that simple. It does, however, change the way we approach each other in the midst of those conflicts, wars, and debates. It opens our minds, hearts, and wills to consider more than just ourselves. It offers new possibilities and creates options. It brings about an awareness of and concern for all, including ourselves.
And that is exactly what Solomon asked for. He sought an understanding mind to govern and care for God’s people. He wanted the ability to discern between good and evil. He recognized that a me attitude could not sustain the kingdom. He calls himself “a little child,” one who does “not know how to go out or come in.” His concern was for the kingdom not himself.
That shift from me to we is not easy. It means letting go of the past patterns that no longer work, suspending judgments, and redirecting our attention to a future that wants to emerge in and through us.
That emerging future is the kingdom of heaven. The shift from me to we happens within us before it ever happens outside and around us. Which is exactly why Solomon’s shift first happened in a dream.
Move 3
So what does that shift look like? What does a we life look like? In a person, it looks a lot like Jesus.
A me life is one of power, domination, and control. A we life is one of vulnerability, intimacy, and self-giving.
A me life is characterized by rhetoric, frenzied reaction, and isolation. A we life is characterized by silence, stillness, and presence.
A me life is filled with doubt, cynicism, and fear. A we life is filled with faith, hope, and love.
A me life clings tightly to the past. A we life embodies what might be.
A me life draws lines that divide. A we life draws circles that encompass.
So many of today’s world circumstances, and even our own life’s circumstances, continue to remind us that a me attitude just doesn’t work. And truthfully, it never has. So why do we continue living that way? People are being killed, homes destroyed, and relationships broken. The world is bleeding out and tears are flowing. Today’s me approach continues to crucify the we life Jesus lived and offered.
Jesus’ love is what enables, encourages, and teaches us to choose we over me. But we must choose. Every minute, every day, every situation, and every relationship hold the choice before us.
Solomon chose a we attitude. He asked for a listening heart, a heart with ears, a heart that would hear the pain of the world, the needs of the people, and the voice of God. He did not ask for himself long life, riches, or even the defeat of his enemy. And because Solomon chose a we attitude, it pleased the Lord.
Conclusion
It’s important to note, however, that’s not where Solomon’s story ends. If you read a couple of verses past today’s text you will read, “Then Solomon awoke; it had been a dream.” (1 Kings 3:15). It was all a dream, but yet it wasn’t just a dream.
That it was a dream doesn’t mean it wasn’t real and it doesn’t mean Solomon’s waking was the end of the dream. To the contrary, his awaking was the beginning of a new reality. He awoke to a new possibility, for himself and for the people he loved and led. That reality and possibility would be realized every time Solomon chose we over me, every time he lived the dream.
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Our lives and our world desperately need a new reality and a new possibility. God has entrusted each of us with Solomon’s dream and it is well past time to wake up and go live the dream. So what will it be? Will the dream come true? Well, that is up to us because each of us decides… Will it be me? Or will it be we? What’s it going to be? Amen.
Pastoral Prayer, August 11, 2024
Almighty and all-knowing God, in his prayer to you, Solomon asked for his will and perception of the world to be in line with yours. He sought a new vision for your people at a new time in their history. He asked that your wisdom be instilled in him so that he would be guided by you and you alone in all he said and did.
We see how Solomon does not need a rod and staff like Moses, because the Jews are not in captivity. Nor does he need military resources like his father David, because he fights a battle not of weapons or warring nations. Rather the challenges before Solomon are weary hearts fighting doubt and uncertainty, striving to bring together your people, and deepen their commitment to following in your ways.
And the most critical and faithful act Solomon did was to acknowledge how he needed your help, your blessing, your wisdom, for he knew he couldn’t live out his call on his own.
And so the prayer of Solomon is our prayer too Holy God. Help us to know when and how to ask for help, and who to ask for it from. Help us to have a discerning heart that seeks to understand what trials we are facing, what needs need to be managed. Help us understand it must be your will, and not ours, that must be done. Help us be patient to know that even when it does not feel like it, you are at work, and your work is always for good.
And then give to us not riches, not even power and authority—but give us wisdom—your wisdom. For this blessing alone will serve both me and we.
We ask that you would listen now to the prayers of our hearts as we lift them to you in this time of Holy Silence.
All this we pray in the name of our Lord and Savior Jesus the Christ, who taught us…we… together… to pray, saying, “Our…”